Happy Samhain...Happy Hallow's Eve...Happy Halloween!
(yes, that is one of my kiddos' pumpkins. lol)
Have you all carved your pumpkins? Bought your candy? Decorated your windows and primed your porch light?
Good! Me too. ;)
**serious blog transition alert**
And if that doesn't surprise you, maybe this will:
While I was doing all the busy-bee things this week like party planning, karate classes and traveling for work...I took a few minutes to contemplate the season and its meaning.
Samhain is a Pagan holiday celebrated with as much reverence as Christmas is for Christians. We look around us, taking in the sights and smells of Fall turning to Winter, enjoying the reminder that the goddess is both the supplier of life and bringer of death. We understand that the Samhain is the beginning of shorter days, longer nights. And we understand that it doesn't only apply to the trees and flowers. It applies to us as well.
So, I looked back over the previous year at what I had accomplished, how I had grown. Turns out not much, writing wise. I had a couple of releases with my publisher but I haven't been consistent, and I haven't kept on top of promo like I should have. However, even despite my quiet year as an author, my big achievement came in my personal life when I finally admitted this year that since my youngest was born, I've had issues with controlling my moods. PMDD they call it. (Think PMS x's 10). I'm on medication for that, and now my family is back in the forefront of my existence as they should be.
I admit I have struggled to gain perspective in other areas - I have let down my friends and fans, my fellow writers, those who are aspiring writers and asked for help. I have let myself down. Not completely. But enough. I developed what I think of as "Author's Pride" - that frame of mind where you are a wonder in your own eye, can only go up (ha!), and have lost sight of what else is important.
Like learning about the craft of writing. Becoming a better author, person, friend, mentor. Apologizing for those letdowns. Receiving inspiration. Giving back.
As a result, the storytelling in my head went quiet for a while. A long while. Only now is it beginning to rumble back to life, now that I've settled some and can see that I was my own obstacle. Once again I have projects in the "pot", simmering, coming to a boil...like a great recipe, waiting for the moment for all the components to gel together into one amazing dish. Into a great story that people can't wait to read.
It's close. I can feel it.
Because on Samhain it is always best to remember that though the goddess has ushered in the final season, has shown her willingness to wither the beautiful things we see during Spring and Summer...she also is a wonderful deity who shows her power with regeneration and rebirth. Resilience and fortitude. Love and hope.
*Hugs* to all. Have a safe Halloween and save the Dots for me. ;)